my brief thoughts on.... 'Ils aka Them'

the French continually impress me with their horror films.... this one may classify as more of a thriller or something like that, but it's extremely terrifying regardless.... this plays on one of my fears, home invasion.... it's not the first time a film has been made about this subject.... the most recent one that comes to mind is 'The Strangers'.... i think this film might be a bit more frightening then 'The Strangers'.... and one of the reasons for that is something that i don't want to give away, you'll just have to see it to find out what it is.... if you've seen 'Eden Lake' then you'll have an idea what the secret is.... anyway.... the budget seems fairly low for this film.... or perhaps it's just that they use so few sets.... the majority of the time is set in the home of the couple that's being terrorized.... regardless of this, the film is very effective on so many levels.... they also keep the villans hidden and early on all you see is a flash of light or a knock on the door.... you don't actually see them until the last like 15 minutes of the film....

the story is about a couple who have a home that's seculded from other people.... they come home after a normal day only to begin being terrorized by unseen attackers.... it starts out innocently enough, but gradually becomes more and more agressive.... soon the attackers are in the house and the couple is split up.... and it's a fight for their lives from a group of relentless unseen enemies....
this is a film that you should watch late at night with the lights off and all alone.... it plays on our most basic animal fears, those of being out of control and fighting to survive.... this film, although fairly simple in storyline, succeeds in so many ways.... and takes you on an exhausting journey that will stick with you for a few days after the fact.... if you don't mind subtitles and have just a little bit of time to kill, i highly recommend that you see this film.... currently it's avaiable only to rent from Netflix, but it's well worth the time.... it's a solid 4 out of 5 stars and a film that doesn't need anything changed about it.... it's the right length of time, a simple enough storyline, well done cimematography, great direction, good acting and a pretty satisfying ending.... all in all, something that is hard to find in films these days....

if you like this, watch: 'The Strangers', 'Eden Lake', and 'August Underground: Penance'

trailer is in English, but the film is in French:

my thoughts on.... 'The Short Films of David Lynch'

David Lynch is an artist.... one of a very small group of living artists that i can honestly say that i respect.... it took me a while to understand the mind of David Lynch and to appreciate his films.... but now, i watch and re-watch his films getting something new out of them everytime.... i wait for his next projects to emerge.... and i appreciate the dedication that he has to his art.... it's rare to find someone who basically lives for creation and the joy of new ideas.... whether or not you can appreciate him the way that i do, you have to respect his vision and his never compromise attitude.

this collection of 6 short films is a compilation of his earliest work and some other more recent pieces of work.... it's a nice cross-section of his non-feature length films.... not all of these are stand out examples of what he's capable of, but every artist has to experiment to find his voice.... that's kind of what some of this is, watching someone figure out who they are on film.... so you kind of have to take these with a grain of salt.... don't expect them all to be 4 star films and you won't be disappointed....
(these descriptions are being paraphrased from Netflix....)
1) 'Six Men Getting Sick': this is David Lynch's very first film.... it's a one minute loop of an art installation.... it was originally projected over a sculpture.... the film describes it perfectly, it's 6 men's heads getting sick and vomiting....
2) 'The Alphabet': this is a 5 minute short that David Lynch describes as an illustration of "the fear of learning".... it's a blend of live-action and animation.... where the alphabet is basically being 'born'....
3) 'The Grandmother': in this film, a little boy who's been mistreated by his parents decides to grow his own grandmother.... so he plants a seed and gets his wish, at least for a little while....
4) 'The Amputee': David Lynch is actually in this live-action comedy short.... he plays the nurse.... while he attempts to clean her wounds, she is oblivious to all of the horrible things happening at the same time....
5) 'The Cowboy and the Frenchman': this comedy was produced by French television and shows a stereotypical Frenchmen being thrust into the middle of some cowboys and a native American.... it stars one of David Lynch's favorites, Harry Dean Stanton....
6) 'Lumiere': this is a 52-second, single-take short film.... it was filmed with Auguste and Louis Lumiere's original Cinematographe, which was the cutting edge of film technology in 1895....

there may be times during this 6 films that you have to struggle a bit.... as they can be slow or seem repetitive.... but if you persist, you'll find something unique in each of them to enjoy.... and for those of you who are fans of David Lynch, this is a must.... those of you who aren't, may want to start elsewhere in his library of film and television.... i ended up only give this 3 out of 5 stars.... which is unusual for a Lynch film from me.... but it's a rounded off score based on a rating given to each short film.... like i said already, some are better than others....

if you like this, watch: 'Eraserhead', 'The Elephant Man', or 'Inland Empire'

this is David Lynch's short film: 'The Alphabet'.... to give you an idea of what to expect:

my thoughts on.... 'Resident Evil: Afterlife'

it's no secret that i'm not a video game player.... i used to be when i was a youth.... then i was on and off again in college.... and eventually i got a Wii for free in a contest, bought a couple of games but never really used it that much.... but i've seen a lot of the video game movies that have come out.... and i must say that the 'Resident Evil' movies have been some of my favorite.... granted, i know little to nothing about the games, but that doesn't seem to matter with these.... they're stand alone movies.... i would even say that the 'Resident Evil' movies are good movies outside of the video game realm.... they may not be deep thinking films, but they're fun to watch and have a continual storyline that just keeps getting more and more in depth.... although, i'm not sure if it makes a lot of sense at times.... i mean, the Umbrella Corporation are sure going through a lot of trouble to get Alice back.... and meanwhile, the world has basically ended.... regardless, i've watched the whole series multiple times and they never get old.... i like the storyline and the actors involved.... no matter how over the top it gets, i still look forward to each new movie that comes out.... you know what, it doesn't hurt that Milla Jovovich is the star.... she's a fairly credible action heroine and kicks some ass on the big screen.... i have yet to see her in a movie that i didn't like.... and she's especially cool in these movies.... Alice is a great character....

in this 4th installment, we find Alice and her squadron of clones attacking the Umbrella Corporation in Tokyo.... after barely escaping with her life, she makes her way to Alaska where an outpost is supposed to be located.... once she realizes that the outpost doesn't seem to exist, she ends up re-united with Claire Redfield.... she takes her plane with Claire and heads to find a new location and refuge.... she ends up in an abandoned prison with several other survivors and finds out that the outpost has re-located to just outside of where she is.... the rest of the movie is spent showing Alice and the other survivors trying to get to safety....
there are some great scenes of zombie horde action.... there is a horrific giant, known as The Executioner, who has a frightening fight with Alice and Claire.... there's lots of great action sequences.... the special effects are pretty solid.... and despite the fact that this was originally in 3-D, it holds up well in 2-D and doesn't seem to cheesy.... even if you can see where the shots are in the movie.... now, being a fan of the franchise, i may be a little biased but i gave this 4 out of 5 stars.... as i've done for the other 3 movies as well.... again, it's not high art.... it's a zombie, horror, action movie with a plot.... so if you haven't seen any of them yet, please start with the original and watch them all in order from there.... if you don't expect too much, i think you'll be pleasently surprised....

before you watch this, watch: 'Resident Evil', 'Resident Evil: Apocalypse', and 'Resident Evil: Extinction'

a BIG thank you to you all....!

this February marks not only my return to blogging (hopefully).... but also the 1st birthday of http://amomentarylapsewithjoel.blogspot.com/ ....! i've been doing this for one full year now.... granted, it's been inconsistent.... however, it's done what i wanted it to do.... it's given me an outlet for my love of film.... and allows me to share my thoughts on them and to hopefully give you, the reader, some suggestions on things to see or not see.... i may not be the best review writer.... but i try.... and this blog has also proved that i can stick with it.... which is something that i've not done in the past.... and finally, it's given me back my confidence.... something i lost a while ago and had to fight to get back.... so, as you can see, this blog means a lot to me.... no matter how silly it is.... and how crappy my review writing skills are.... i'm just glad that some of you dig it, write to me about it and read it.... i couldn't ask for anything more....

so to you the reader.... THANK YOU....! here's to another year ahead.... full of the good, the bad, and the outright ugly films that cinema has to offer....

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Alice in Wonderland' (2010)

remember my review of 'Where the Wild Things Are'....? this might be a bit like that.... just so you know.

Tim Burton is a unique filmaker.... his vision is all his own.... and i can say that i've enjoyed just about everything he's ever done.... that also goes for Johnny Depp.... i've followed his career since '21 Jump Street'.... these two have made several films together and have been very successful ones at that.... but recently, it seems that you can't have one without the other.... i'm all for collaboration and a lot of times if you're working with the same people over and over you get good results.... however, after a while, you kind of want them to do some things seperately.... and that's the case here.... i thought it might be kind of neat to see what Tim Burton could do with this classic story.... and i'm always curious to see Johnny Depp's take on a character, especially one like the Mad Hatter.... sadly, the result was less than stellar....
i'm sure you all know the storyline of 'Alice in Wonderland'.... we've seen it retold several times.... but in this day and age, we finally have the technology to make some of the strange characters of the story come to life.... and i think that this was a valiant attempt.... however, it just had no soul.... it's like Tim Burton just phoned this one in.... it felt forced.... it seemed like he was trying too hard.... it was just way too heavy handed with the filmaking.... everything was quirky and over the top, like all of his movies.... everything was bright and colorful.... the music was excellent.... the special effects, however, were kind of sketchy.... and that surprised me, but that's not why i didn't care for this movie.... i tried really hard to enjoy it.... i felt kind of guilty for not liking it.... all in all, i only ended up giving this movie 2 out of 5 stars.... something i thought i'd never see from a Burton/Depp movie.... but that's not the end of it.... they've got more projects in the works.... and i just think that a little distance isn't always a bad thing.... so i hope that they see that someday and take a little break from each other.... because if not, i fear that we'll see more movies like this one.... movies that just feel like they were made for the sake of being made.... no other reason than that....

shame on you Tim Burton, shame on you.

please read the book rather than see this movie.... you're imagination is going to create something much more enjoyable then this movie could ever hope for

my brief thoughts on.... 'The Last Exorcism'

before i start this review, let me say two things: 1) i think that PG-13 and horror movies DO NOT MIX.... horror, since the dawn of cinema, has been designed to scare, shock, and horrify the viewer.... how can you do that when you're limited by what you can show or say....? there are very few examples of horror movies that have overcome that obstacle, but it takes a lot to do it.... 2) Eli Roth produced this movie.... he didn't write it, direct it or star in it.... and i have the utmost respect for him.... i've said that he's one of the few writers and directors in Hollywood that might save horror, but after seeing this.... i'm a little let down.... i was hoping he'd produce something that held up to his standards.... that being said....

'The Exorcist' set the bar so high, that no one since it has topped it.... it's the standard for what a scary film should be.... it makes a lot of people's top 10 scariest films list.... it showed exorcism's in a way that hasn't lost its punch since it came out in 1973.... and i've seen several movies that have tried to be like it.... all of them have fallen short.... so that brings us to this movie, 'The Last Exorcism'.... it looked promising, it had a credible producer.... how could it fail....? now, when i started it, i was sucked right into the plot.... i wanted to see how the story played itself out.... sadly, it couldn't keep up with what it promised in the beginning.... it just wasn't going to happen.... there was one thing that stood out in this movie, Ashley Bell, the star.... she played the character of Nell with amazing reality.... i bought into it: hook, line, and sinker.... and i also give credit to Daniel Stamm, the director.... he did the best with what he had....
this movie is carrying on the trend of a documentary style of filmaking.... although this one is obviously shot on 35 mm.... it tells the story of a supposed exorcist who travels to do his final exorcism on a girl named Nell.... what, at first, seems to be a simple case of a girl with mental issues, quickly descends into something deeper and more evil.... things play themselves out in such a way that you don't see the ending coming.... granted, it keeps you interested the whole time.... but the ending just does not hold up.... it builds to a fever pitch and then the kettle just sputters out and never whistles.... it's ambiguous.... it's slightly unclear.... it is a bit of a poor explanation of all the events that took place earlier in the movie.... it just feels like someone pulled the rug out from under you, just when you got up to go to the bathroom.... ah well.... at least i don't have to watch it again....

to Eli Roth: please make another film on your own.... i know you like acting, but try and do both.... we could use some 'R' rated horror right now....

and to the rest of you.... i gave this movie 3 out of 5 stars.... i felt that Ashley Bell's performance was so good that it deserved some credit.... and if you decide to watch this, watch about 30 - 45 minutes of it and then turn it off.... write the ending however you'd like it.... the ending just doesn't matter.... i'm glad this was the last exorcism, i don't think i could handle a sequel.

rather than watch any other exorcism movie, watch 'The Exorcist' again

my brief thoughts on.... 'Buried' (2010)

one of my biggest fears is to be buried alive.... not neccessarily in a coffin.... but in dirt or sand or any way that would suffocate me and kill me.... sort of like drowning with something other than water.... (drowning freaks me out too).... this film plays on those fears.... those most basic fears of being out of control and knowing you're going to die.... add into that, mix the fact that you have a family that you may never see again.... that you're being held for ransom by terrorists that your government will never pay off.... you have a cell phone, but it's of no real use since you're buried underground.... and that's not all the bad stuff that occurs while Ryan Reynolds is trapped in the coffin.... things just go from bad to worse.... and what's amazing is that all of this is accomplished by one man and a cell phone.... (assisted by the people on the phone)....

you don't know anything about the main character when the story starts, but by the end you know everything about Ryan's character.... why he's there, his family life, what's going on outside of the coffin.... it's all done with the script.... and it just proves that you don't need a mega-budget and big explosions to make a nail-biting film.... this keeps you on the edge of your seat as well as any thriller out there right now.... it's an impressive feat.... and hats off to Chris Sparling, the writer.... it almost feels like a play, but one where you're on the stage with the performer....

Ryan Reynolds plays Paul Conroy, an American contractor in Iraq who drives trucks.... his convoy is hit by an IUD and then attacked by terrorists.... he's taken hostage and wakes up in a coffin.... with only a few items and time running out, he frantically does everything he can to save his life and get back home.... (that's the basic plot.... there's more, but i don't want to give too much away)....
this film is directed by Rodrigo Cortes, a director that i had never heard of before this.... he's done previous films, but this one is the one that i think will put him on the map.... his direction of Ryan Reynolds is something to be seen.... to think that this was the guy who was Van Wilder and now this....? it shows he's got skills.... not too mention that he does so much with so little.... and uses it all so effectively.... there are also some amazing things done with the camera.... things that i'm still not sure how he pulled them off.... i guess a lot of that falls on the shoulders of his cinematographer, but i'm sure he helped to map everything out.... it's very claustrophobic.... almost "Hitchcockian" in it's tone and feel.... granted, the end was not 100% surprising, but it made it no less effective.... and no less satisfying.... (i've been using that word a lot lately, but it's the only way i can describe the feeling i get when a film or movie pays off what it's been building up too)....

all that being said, i gave it a solid 4 out of 5 stars.... i really need to see if the DVD has a 'Making of' on it.... or if there's one out there.... i would love to see what camera tricks they used to film it.... if that sounds interesting at all, check it out.... it's available to rent from Netflix.... and i'm sure, plenty of other places....

if you like this, you might want to watch: 'Frozen', 'Open Water', or perhaps 'Phonebooth'

my brief thoughts on.... 'I'm Still Here'

i'm sure you remember you remember where you were when you heard that the Challenger blew up....? or where you were when you heard about 9/11....? or where you were when you heard that Joaquin Phoenix was going to quit acting and start a rap career....? okay, maybe you remember the first two.... but you don't remember the third....? wow.... i'm not surprised.... i don't remember either.

that doesn't matter.... what matters is the year that followed after his initial announcement.... and that's what this faux-documentary was all about.... as much as i hate to admit it, i found Joaquin Phoenix much more interesting during that year than any of his earlier career.... (yes, i'm not a big fan).... i was on to the whole ruse early on.... i even said so to my friends that i thought it was all staged and that if it was, it was brilliant.... look out Sascha Baron Cohen....! however, the end result was far less satisfactory than 'Bruno', 'Da Ali G Show', or 'Borat'.... regardless, i watched this documentary and i'll admit that i enjoyed it.... i'm still not sure which parts were real or staged.... (some are obvious).... but this showed Joaquin in some pretty unflattering light.... and i'm surprised he would take a chance of ruining his career to go that far for a 'joke'.... i guess that's what kind of makes this genius.... it's not high art, but it's damn entertaining.... Casey Affleck shows real promise as a filmaker and he's already proven himself as an actor.... i also felt like some of what Joaquin accomplised with his music and rapping wasn't that bad.... and the beard and glasses with the suit kind of sold the whole package.... i'm still really into the branding that was done to promote the documentary.... i would totally put a poster up of the image above....
now you're asking, "Should I bother watching this?".... i would tell you that it all depends on your thoughts on Joaquin or if you want to spend the hour and a half on a gag....? it's not a 4 star filmgoing experience, it's 3 at best.... but that doesn't make it any less fun to watch.... there's moments of brilliance and moments where i cringed.... there's also moments where i just didn't care what was going on.... i don't know what Casey and Joaquin set out to accomplish, but i hope they were successful.... i have no idea what's going on with Joaquin now.... i haven't heard of any upcoming projects or anything.... and i'm not sure if he's gone up and ruined his career.... either way, i'm glad i was able to go along for the ride.... i gave it 3 out of 5 stars.... i suggest you check out the trailer online and make the choice for yourself....

note to Joaquin: i'm not sure about the rest of your career, but i think you should bring back the beard, suit, and sunglasses and keep on with the rapping.... but maybe that's just me.

if you like this, watch: any of Christopher Guest's films
(did this review even make sense....?!?!)

just a friendly reminder....

if you like what you read here.... my old MySpace blog has tons more reviews available for your viewing.... feel free to cruise on over and check them out....!
just as a warning, they're not fantastic and some of the images may be broken by now....

here's the link, kids.... enjoy....!http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=414317&blogId=507914524

also, if you're not already, friend me at:
http://www.facebook.com/joelunitardshow
let me know that you found me on here....!
:)

my very brief thoughts on.... 'The 'Burbs'

i'm going to keep this brief, as i'm afraid of the possible backlash or repurcussions of writing this review....

i know that 'The 'Burbs' has a cult following.... and it's one of Tom Hanks earlier movies, back when he still did comedy.... it's directed by the well known, Joe Dante.... it's got a good cast.... but i just don't enjoy this movie.... i've watched it twice now and i liked it even less the 2nd time.... i don't know what it is about this movie.... i really like Tom Hanks.... and it seems like something i would enjoy, plot wise.... however, i don't get the attraction.... i just don't get it.... maybe i'm missing something....? the plot is clunky, the acting is not great, it just isn't very good....
you're all welcome to try and change my mind.... i am always willing to give a movie another shot.... and i've given 'The 'Burbs' two days in court and no matter how hard i tried, i just did not enjoy myself.... i lowered my rating from 2 out of 5 stars to only 1.... i still enjoy Joe Dante's work.... i still like Tom Hanks.... but this is one i won't partake in again....

if you like early Tom Hanks movies, watch: 'The Money Pit', 'Bachelor Party' or 'Big'

my very brief thoughts on.... 'American Swing'

i'm going to keep this short and sweet, which i wish the filmakers had done as well.... this is a documentary about Plato's Retreat.... the best known swinger's club in New York.... it doesn't exist anymore, obviously.... not with all the diseases and what not going around.... this movie documents the rise and fall of the club.... they talk to all the old patrons and use photos, old film and TV spots to try and bring it to life for the viewer.... sadly, this movie just doesn't hold the viewers attention.... not even with the nudity involved.... it is just kind of a mess and fairly boring....

i gave it 1 out of 5 stars.... it's nothing you should waste your time on.

instead of watching this, have sex with someone instead

my brief thoughts on.... 'The Human Centipede (First Sequence)'

if you scroll down this page a bit, you'll find two reviews.... one for the 'August Underground' trilogy and one for 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film'.... if you have convinced yourself, based on what you've heard, that this movie is the most disturbing movie you'll see this year.... think again.... those two movies make this one look like a Disney take on 'Frankenstein'.... granted, Tom Six the director, created a very disturbing concept and pulled it off with amazing results.... and i can say that i've NEVER seen anything like this movie.... and the concept is nothing that i've ever considered in my wildest dilusions.... so hats off to him for making something that's not a remake or reboot.... it's proof that all the ideas aren't used up....

if you don't know about this movie.... the story involves two young women who run out of gas on the way out to party.... they go for help and end up at a home where the kind man inside lets them inside to use the phone.... instead, he drugs them and next thing they know, they're in his basement and being told that they're going to be turned into a giant centipede.... there's another man in the room with them, but he's soon killed as he just doesn't 'fit' with the others.... soon an Asian man is kidnapped and brought into the basement too.... he doesn't speak any english.... but that doesn't stop the kind man, who turns out to be a mad doctor of sorts, from explaining his diabolical plan.... he plans on attaching each one of them ass to mouth in a series where they create a centipede like creature with one digestive system.... as you can imagine, the first time the first link in the centipede has to, um, poop.... things get real.... and the second person in the group puts on an amazing performance that will make you as uncomfortable as you can possibly be during a movie.... and nothing is shown, it's all implied.... the rest just goes down hill from there....
they say that Tom Six has intended this to be a trilogy, with the next movie being 'The Human Centipede (Full Sequence)'.... i don't know if he can carry off two more movies, because this first one is a stretch.... but i'll admit he pulls it off and kept me interested the whole time.... and the man who plays the doctor, Dieter Laser, puts on an amazing performance that deserves a cult following.... he steals the show from the 3 part human centipede.... and it's worth it just to see him act.... i think if you can overcome your fear that's been created by over the top critics, you might just enjoy this little roller coaster of a ride.... granted, you can't unthink the things this movie makes you think.... as so much is implied and subtly hidden that it's so much worse because it's left up to your imagination.... and that's so much more powerful than any special FX that could have been created.... it's currently available OnDemand from Netflix or to rent as well.... think it over, it's something i don't regret in any way.... and i don't think you will either.... unless you have a weak stomach. (3 out of 5 stars.)

if you like this, watch: a daisy chain porno or 'The Human Sexipede (First Sequence)' (the XXX parody movie).... they're the closest things i can think of to sort of match up with this movie

my thoughts on.... 'A Complete History Of My Sexual Failures'

every once in a while a documentary comes along that takes me by surprise and i fall in love with it instantly.... this originally wasn't something i was 100% interested in seeing.... but it came in the mail from Netflix on accident and i decided it was a sign to see what this was all about.... i knew the basic premise and that's what made me add it to my queue to begin with.... what's it about....? it's about something that i think everyone of you has thought about at some point in your lives.... going back to all of your ex's and asking them why you split up and what they thought/think of you.... in this case, Chris Waitt, our loveable hero decides that after years of failures in relationships he wants to try and figure out why.... and somehow he pitches this idea to the right people and gets funding to make this film.... he starts out by making a list of ex's he wants to interview about the topic.... and at first things aren't looking too good.... it's so questionable that he's almost shut down from finishing the film.... but he carries on and eventually starts to see things turn around and soon we're going along with him as he gets answers from the women in his past.... some good and some REALLY not so good.... however, it starts to show a trend and helps him to get a better idea of what it is about him that kept him single.... and by the time the third act rolls around, he's had his character arc and things finally start to go his way.... there is also a follow up short documentary about what happened after the filming and if you rent this DVD i recommend that you watch it.... if you enjoyed what you saw....

i can honestly say that i've contemplated this idea in the past.... granted, it was a bit before i was married.... and since then it really hasn't mattered.... but there was a period where i needed answers and it seemed like going to the source would be the best way.... in retrospect, i'm glad i didn't take that path as i'm pretty sure it would've ended up in disaster.... but i think it's a universal feeling.... to want to revisit what's already happend to get closure, answers, updates, or possibly a fresh start.... this documentary made that happen and was so well done that i felt completely satisfied by the end and wanted to watch it again.... i will be putting this one on my short list of films to own someday.... Chris is from across the pond and i don't know if that adds a different angle to this film or not, but i think it's an across the board kind of thing the way it pans out.... i may be alone in my love of this documentary, as i've heard some negative things about it.... but i equate it with Morgan Spurlock's 'Super Size Me'.... they are opposite types of films, but Morgan and Chris both have that 'It' factor that makes me want to hang out with them.... even if it's just for an hour and a half in a movie....
this film was deserving of 4 out of 5 stars and that's what i gave it.... a simple slice of one man's life, documented by himself and shown to the world.... warts and all.... he puts himself out there and sets aside the notion of possible judgement of his character in favor of giving the viewer something entertaining and educational.... the end is something i'd love to tell you about, but i think it's best you see it for yourself.... so go and add it to your queue and check it out.... i can only hope it gives you the same enjoyment it gave me.

if you like this, check out: 'Super Size Me', 'Brother's Keeper', and 'American Movie'

my very brief thoughts on.... '2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams'

Herschell Gordon Lewis set the standard for gore.... and he did it starting in the 60's....! before he came along, horror movies were fairly tame by today's standards.... they were starting down the path towards more horrific things, but Herschell saw a niche market out there and he filled it.... the blood was obviously fake and the guts and stuff were borrowed from other animals insides.... but regardless of that, i still find his movies a little difficult to watch at times.... like 'The Gore Gore Girls'.... what does that have to do with '2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams'....? well, it's the sequel to the remake of Herschell's 1964 classic '2000 Maniacs!'.... the original was just that, it was original.... the reamke had some of the same spirit, but it just never captured the magic.... for some reason though, they decided to make a sequel to the first one.... instead of Robert Englund ('A Nightmare on Elm Street' series) in the lead, they replaced his character with one played by Bill Moseley ('The Devil's Rejects').... they continued the storyline of the first one, with more of the southerners who killed the 'yankees' in the first one taking their show on the road to kill 'yankees' instead....
i love Bill Moseley and he does the best he can with his role in this movie, but it's just not a very good movie.... they attempt to re-create the type of gore that Herschell Gordon Lewis made famous, but they fall short of the mark.... it's a bit lame at times and i think that's kind of the point.... however, i was hoping for a little more.... they also include in the storyline some main characters ('yankees') who are very similar to those of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie during the 'Simple Life' years.... it's not subtle, as a matter of fact it's blatent.... i would've rather seen those two getting chopped up on camera, but that's too much to hope for.... all that being said, you can aready guess that i only gave it 1 out of 5 stars.... there was nothing worthwhile in this movie other than Bill Moseley.... but it's not worth the damage it will cause to watch this, just to enjoy the scenes he's in.... this is a sequel that should have just stayed in the back of someones mind as a bad idea.... instead of on DVD as a bad idea.

if you want to see where this all began, watch: 'Two Thousand Maniacs!' (1964), 'Blood Feast' (1963), or 'Color Me Blood Red' (1965)

my brief thoughts on.... 'The Butcher'

the Korean film industry continues to impress me with what they're releasing.... not just in one genre, but across the board.... i've seen so many good Korean films in the past several years.... now when i came across 'The Butcher' i did so because of a little blurb about it in the years roundup of good films from the past year.... it's not a movie with much out there that i could find out about it.... but it's available from Netflix to rent.... obviously this is a horror movie.... some might use the buzz words, 'Torture Porn'.... i hate that term and disagree with it and don't use it.... this is a grusome piece of work and is not short on blood, guts, gore and horrific acts of violence.... but that's what it advertises and you shouldn't be expecting any less than that stuff.... i mean, look at the cover....! a man in a pigs head with a chainsaw and a butcher-type apron.... that doesn't scream Meg Ryan comedy/love story....

this movie is probably one that will have a lot of love/hate reviews.... it's kind of something where you either enjoyed it or hated it.... i'm on the left side of that arguement.... i actually found this to be an original, little gore fest with a lot of potential that pays off just enough to leave you feeling satisfied at the end.... what's it about, you ask....? that's the neat thing that makes this stand out.... the storyline is not original at all.... you have several men who are kidnapping and killing innocent people in an old barn/warehouse thing.... but they're filming each murder and selling it to a specialized market.... 'snuff' films for the masses.... however, where this differs quite a bit from other movies is how it's filmed.... you not only view this from the third party perspective, but through the eyes of the killers and the victims.... that little trick is accomplished by the killers attaching cameras to helmets that the victims have to wear.... so you get to feel what it might be like to be the one in the chair as the killer is doing horrible things to you.... but then the view changes and then it changes again.... it is something i don't remember seeing before in a movie.... it puts this on a different level, instead of just being another slasher flick....
i ultimately gave this 3 out of 5 stars.... i couldn't quite justify the 4 star rating.... it had it's moments and accomplished exactly what it set out to do.... but something left me feeling a little unsatisfied at the end.... the way that the movie ended wasn't bad.... i felt it ended the best way it could.... and boy did i feel dirty.... especially after the decision our lead character made to save his own life.... if that doesn't give you a direct punch in the face, then i don't know what will.... that being said, only rent this if you've enjoyed other movies with over the top blood and guts and scenes of violence....

other movies that are similar: 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre' (2003), 'Hostel' and the 'August Underground' trilogy

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Pervert!'

the poster boasts that this is "the most outrageous movie ever made".... i was outraged all right.

i'm going to start this review with my rating of it: 1 out of 5 stars.... this was a movie where they took 1 part Cinemax midnight movie, 1 part Russ Meyer movie, 2 parts low budget schlock, and 1 part stop animation.... mix for an hour and change, throw directly in the toilet.... that's the recipie for this movie.... it looks fairly nice, i mean the cinematography is decent.... but the script is about as entertaining as the phone book.... the actors, if you can call them that, are just there as talking props.... the unknown killer that's revealed at the ending, is just plain stupid.... and the nudity is pointless and tiresome.... i guess it's a step up for Mary Carey.... instead of doing porn, she can show her range in a mainstream movie.... LOL
i doubt any of you will actually ever watch this, but just in case.... i won't give away the ending.... needless to say, it's piss poor even by low budget standards.... the story goes that a son comes home to his father's after being away at college.... his father is with a much younger woman, played by Mary Carey.... some stuff occurs, people start dying and the son begins to suspect his father.... meanwhile, the son is having an affair with the younger woman, right in front of his father's face.... almost literally.... they eventually find out who the real killer is and that's the point where you either turn it off or pause it to drink until you're blind and just don't care anymore about what you're seeing....

bad, bad, bad.

instead of this, watch: a Cinemax late night movie, a Russ Meyer movie or paint drying

my thoughts on.... 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film'

i've always said that a 'film' is art.... and a 'movie' is just entertainment.... 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film' falls into the film category, but a special segment of film.... one where only the films that shock you deep down in your soul, films that raise the bar into a different realm, films that you can't say you 'liked' them or 'loved' them because they're not that kind of film.... they have horrific themes in them that would make you seem like some kind of depraved monster to 'love' them.... however, you have to respect them for their originality or their message, good or bad.... therefore, i can't say that i love or even like 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film'.... it made me feel dirty and like i was some kind of sick-o for enjoying it.... i don't even know that i would say that i respect this film.... but i will say that this film is something that i am glad i saw, so that i can express my thoughts about it with open eyes instead of with a bias based on reviews.... and the reviews are mixed.... most of them call this the most shocking film ever made.... the most vile piece of cinema ever produced.... they have a serious love/hate relationship with it and with themselves for even watching it....

'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film' is 100% original.... i can honestly say that i've never seen anything like it.... there are so many things in this film that i can never unsee.... things that keep popping up in my head and make me feel like a bad person for seeing this film.... the plot revolves around a retired porn star who is lured back into the business to make a film for a slightly strange director.... he's offered an obscene amount of money, but isn't told anything about the plot of the movie he's making.... his wife and son are the most important thing to him and he sees the money as a way to set them all up for the life that he's always wanted for them.... so he signs on the dotted line and agrees to make the movie.... on the first day of shooting, things don't seem right and he instantly begins to rethink his decision.... but he is convinced to go back for another day, as it might just be that it was a one time occurance.... it turns out that this wasn't a one off thing, he finds out that what he's gotten himself into might not be worth the money he's been offered.... from there, things go so far downhill that you can't imagine them getting any worse, but then the bottom falls out and he descends directly into a hell on earth....
i refuse to be a reviewer who devulges all the gory details of a film.... too many words have been written about the shocking things that occur in 'A Serbian Film' the spoilers, however very few talk about the positive aspects.... despite the horrors within this film.... i recommend you go into it blind.... if you do, you will not be the same person after seeing it.... (i want to pause here and just warn the potential viewer that this film is the deep end of the pool.... this is for the hardcore filmgoer only.... this is NOT a film for everyone.... there are only a few people i would even suggest this film to and i highly recommend that you stay away from it, unless you have an open mind and can tolerate extreme situations that i promise will sicken you.).... this is a film that if it was done any differnt then it was, it would just be glorified horror pornography.... something shocking for shocking's sake.... but the quality of acting in this is more than Oscar worthy, it's in a whole other category.... the lead actor is so committed to his role that it physically hurts to see him go through what he goes through.... imgaine the biblical story of Job, on crack with John Wayne Gacy controlling Job's fate.... the cinematography is Steven Spielberg quality.... it's a beautifully shot film with some money behind it.... or so it would seem.... this looks like a big budget film.... the script is extremely original and must have taken someone with deeply rooted issues to write it.... some demons to exercise.... i can't even imagine what prompted this script to even be written.... it follows a very strict 3 act formula where the character has an arc and changes.... in other words, this is a film, not a movie....

if you choose to watch 'A Serbian Film', there are several things you can check off your 'bucket list' that you never even knew were on there.... things you didn't want on there.... i promise that you will be disturbed by the ending of the film.... and once you think it's over and things can't get any worse than they've been during the first 2 acts, the rug is pulled out one final time.... you're left with a last line of dialogue that will punch you in the gut one more time so you will not forget what you've just experienced.... i give this 4 out of 5 stars.... however, i don't think i ever want to see it again.... it's a film that will change your opinion about those who've already seen it.... you will wonder if they were the person you thought they were.... but understand that this is not something i will tell you to go out and watch.... i don't want your opinion of me to change.... however, that's not my decision to make.... it's something only you can decide to watch or not.... you have been warned.

there is no other film out there like this, i promise you.

my brief thoughts on.... 'Night of the Demons' (2009)

in 1988, Kevin Tenny directed a fun little flick called 'Night of the Demons'.... it's a cult classic and a film that gets brought up quite often in the horror forums.... it's was good in 1988 and it still holds up in 2011.... i heard of this remake after it was already done and about to come out.... i didn't know what to think.... i'll give every remake a day in court, as i believe that some of them are on par with the original and sometimes even better.... this was not one of those times....

this movie was about demons and a small group of people trying to survive the night in the mansion where the demons have trapped them and are trying to turn them all into demons.... sounds kind of good, right....? it's not.... the story is about a woman who hosts a Halloween party and after the cops raid the mansion where she's hosting the party, things happen and suddenly demons start attacking the remaining partygoers....
the script goes from bad to worse as the movie progresses.... it's full of holes and jumps in logic.... they try to create a backstory that will make the movie deeper than it is.... but it just doesn't work.... the demons look kind of cool and i was happy to see Edward Furlong in a movie again, but it's just so over the top and not very good.... not even bad good that i wouldn't recommend it to anyone.... i gave it 1 out of 5 stars.... and i know that i don't ever need to see it again.... oh and by the way, when Edward Furlong falls through the floor and down about 3 stories, he breaks his leg.... his femur to be exact.... and when Monica Keena repels down to help him, she takes his leg and 'pops' it back into place to splint it.... (he turns into a demon right away *spoiler*, so i guess this whole bit doesn't really matter).... note to the writer of the movie.... if someone breaks their femur and you attempt to re-set it in order to splint it, you can rip the femoral artery and the person will bleed out in about 2 minutes.... so what you've esentially done is given some horrible advice to potential hero's.... just one more strike against this lame remake.

watch: 'Night of the Demons' (1988), 'Night of the Demons 2' (1994), or '28 Days Later'.... those are much better alternate takes on the zombie genre....

my brief thoughts on.... 'La horde aka The Horde'

in this day and age, zombie movie are a dime a dozen.... every director's first movie seems to be in the zombie genre.... there's an oversaturated market right now.... there's new zombie movies come out almost every week.... and very few make a lasting impression.... recently 'The Walking Dead' took the genre and made it into a series.... and it was the first time zombies were on TV on a weekly basis.... now there's another series starting soon and the movies keep coming.... i watch a lot of the movies that come out with the hopes that something fresh or original or at least fun will come out.... i love 'The Walking Dead' and have seen a few good zombie films in the past year or so.... but a couple of weeks ago i finally had the chance to see the French take on the undead....! and let me say that i was NOT dissappointed.... this movie was such a good time to watch.... it is what i would call a 'satisfying' movie.... something where at the end of it, you feel like you didn't waste your time.... and i certainly felt like it was time well spent.

the basic story is that some cops go rogue to avenge the death of a fellow officer.... they infiltrate a run down old apartment complex where the bad guys are hanging out.... things seem to be going fine, but then things suddenly go straight to hell and the cops get caught by the bad guys and are held hostage.... meanwhile, the rest of the world has been taken over by the living dead.... once they realize what's going on, they lockdown the building and make a shaky truce so that they might get out alive.... the rest of the film revolves around them making their way through the building in an attempt to escape....
if you don't mind subtitles, lots of gunfire and some pretty nifty gore, then this film is for you.... i am continually impressed with the quality of the horror films that the French have been producing.... they are a big time contender in the horror genre and this movie proves yet again that they're on the top of their game.... the action is well done.... the zombies are scary.... the characters are well drawn out and you get attached to each and every one of them.... i can't recommend this film enough.... it's a wonderful addition to the zombie lexicon and one that will eventually be a part of the Joel DVD library.... zombie films are my bread and butter of the horror genre.... and this one stands out above all the other garbage that keeps getting pumped out.... i gave it 4 out of 5 stars.... a great film.

if you like this, watch: 'Diary of the Dead', 'Zombieland' or 'Dawn of the Dead' (2004)

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Saw VII: The Final Chapter'

just so you don't think i only write negative reviews.... here's a positive one....!

when i watched the original 'Saw' for the first time, i was in love.... it reminded me of 'Se7en', but not as high budget.... it was a fun trip with a nice twist at the end.... i then watched all of the sequels and finally watched part 7 a couple of weeks ago.... it was an enjoyable watch, just like all the rest.... granted, the series has changed quite a bit since the original.... but everything has to evolve.... and with the 'Saw' series you can't just keep up with the original formula.... it would get boring.... so what did they do....? they turned it into one giant, bloody soap opera... . complete with plot twists, crazy ties between characters, an implausable storyline, and just all out drama.... despite how negative that sounds.... i don't mean it in that way.... i love to watch movies with sequels.... to see the characters grow and change.... and when the series maintains its level of quality throughout all the movies, that's rare.... and even though it might not be cool to say you like the 'Saw' movies anymore, i do.

if you're a fan of the first 6 movies, then you can't go wrong with part 7.... i know they say this is the 'Final Chapter', but there's still room for more sequels.... i don't know if that's the plan, however the option is open....
the storyline continues right where the last movie left off.... there's several traps and more twists and turns to possibly confuse or expand the world James Wan created.... i gave this 4 out of 5 stars.... it's just a good time all the way around and i love to watch these movies in order so i can see the progression.... and i suggest if you haven't done that before, you should try it.... they all tie together so neatly and all the actors remain consistant throughout the series, so there is continuity the whole time.... my final thoughts....? a solid possible end to a franchise that never seemed like it was going to be a franchise in the first place.

if you like this movie, watch all the other 'Saw' movie.... hopefully you don't start with the last one first....

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Cheerleader Autopsy'

i won't lie, this movie sucks.... sucks bad.... i mean, just by the title alone you can assume that.... but it was even worse then i expected.... super low budget, crappy special effects, terrible acting, bad, bad.... bad.... the premise involves a bus of cheerleaders on the way to a competition when their bus crashes and death ensues.... it's followed by a suicide.... then the bodies are all taken to the morgue, a crooked morgue where they sell the human meat to the local dog food factory.... anyway, if it's not bad enough, the special effects look like mannequin's with ketchup on them.... they don't even try to make them realistic.... and that makes this that much worse....
it's OnDemand if you want to submit yourself to this.... but make sure you're drinking heavily and maybe have some friends over to enjoy it with you.... i don't condone this action.... this movie has been known to cause blindness, stupidity, and rage in 4/5 people.... and the 5th one isn't paying attention anyway.... 1 out of 5 stars....

another movie to stay away from and one that has no equals.

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Faust: Love of the Damned'

i used to collect comics back in the late 80's and early 90's.... i had come across an ultra-violent comic called 'Grips' by a man named Tim Vigil.... i instantly fell in love.... it was kind of like Wolverine, without the mutation and with a LOT more blood.... soon after, Tim Vigil started a series called 'Faust: Love of the Damned'.... it was very similar to 'Grips', but it dealt with a man who made a deal with (basically) the devil.... to take revenge on those who murdered his significant other.... but the devil can't control him and he soon begins to wreak havoc and eventually confronts the evil 'M' himself.... it was a kick ass story, killer art, and every teenagers dream of a comic.... eventually (after i stopped collecting) i heard that Brian Yuzna, director of 'Re-Animator', was making a film version of the comic.... i was pretty excited, as Brian Yuzna is a fairly violent and disturbing director.... which made perfect sense with 'Faust'.... soon, stills from the movie started appearing and i begin to get a little concerned.... and when i finally saw an actual shot of Mark Frost as 'Faust' i nearly cried.... it was so terrible.... the reviews once it came out were terrible.... and a friend of mine, a mutual lover of Tim Vigil, saw the movie and told me how horrificly bad it was.... therefore i stayed away for a VERY long time.... it was recently released OnDemand from Netflix.... and i took the time to watch it, despite my better judgement.... i had a slight glimmer of hope that maybe it wasn't as bad as i'd heard.... and since my expectations were SO low, i figured that maybe i'd get some enjoyment out of it....

i was wrong.
Mark Frost's portrayal of 'Faust' was so over the top and bad that i almost turned it off within the first 15 minutes.... however, i generally will watch any movie to the end.... no matter how terrible.... so i soldiered on.... and it just got worse.... there was nothing good about this movie.... nothing.... the worst part was the costume for 'Faust'.... it was obviously made of latex or rubber (it wiggled when he moved) and made the character look like a bad SyFy original movie villan.... the special effects were sub-par.... the writting sucked.... the ending nearly made me hunt down Tim Vigil just so i could punch him in the testicles.... basically, what i'm saying is, "Don't watch this movie. Under any circumstances.".... i can never unsee what i saw.... i can't wash my brain clean of this giant piece of poo.... 1 out of 5 stars.... and i really wish i could give it negative stars....

that's all i have to say about that.

if you like this movie.... i don't think we can be friends.

my thoughts on.... the 'August Underground' trilogy

what can be said about these films that hasn't already been said....? they set the bar for indie gore-fests.... and Fred Vogel set the bar so high that no one has been able to top him.... i've spent years hearing about them and avoiding them like the plague.... i've never been a fan of gore, only in small doses.... ie: i've dabbled in it here and there.... however, as a student of film i feel that in order to be well rounded and able to critique a film, you need to have a firm base.... i mean, you can't honestly have an unbiased opinion if you haven't seen it from all sides.... that's what finally brought me to watch these films.... that and a recent viewing of 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film'.... which has been reviewed with the same vile love and seething hatred that the 'August Underground' series has been reviewed.... the only difference is that 'A Serbian Film' has some high production values and some obvious money behind it.... Fred Vogel had none of that when he started making his films.... (i also enjoy watching the same types of films, so that i can get as many examples as possible of a genre under my belt.)....

in case you've never heard of or seen anything about these films, let me give you a short primer.... Fred Vogel is a guru of special F/X and was hired as an instructor at Tom Savini's school right out of college.... but his love was making films.... his love was film in general.... specifically horror.... and it all started with James Whale's 'Frankenstein'.... oh wait, who's Fred Vogel....? he's the star, writer, producer and director.... the all around brainchild behind the 'August Underground' series of films.... now the films themselves are based on the premise that serial killer movies glorify the killing.... but they don't show the reality of it.... how messy it is.... how horrifying it truly is.... it's all just a big show.... remember the scene in 'Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer' where they videotape their crimes and re-watch it later.... that's the catalyst for the design of these films.... because that one scene stands out in that movie as truly terrifying.... it's all too realistic.... and therefore it hits WAY too close to home.... and what Fred Vogel did was to take that concept and expand on it.... to create the ultimate 'snuff' film.... by using videotape to film the 'August Underground' series, it tears down that safety wall between you and the charaters on the screen.... it brings them right into your living room and it's almost like you're watching your own home movies, but with a lot more death.... the films aren't just all about killing, they also show the day to day life of those who kill.... it makes them even more real.... because the're just like you and me.... granted, some of their day to day stuff is a little 'off', but they're still just flesh and blood people.... but once the killing starts, you see the other side of humanity.... the sickest, cruelest parts.... and the original film was so realistic that it was believed to be a true 'snuff' film at one point.... i suppose that's enough information to give you an insight into what to expect....

the basic premise of the stories involves our main character, played by Fred Vogel.... he's never given a name, he's just our lead.... in the original film, the only oher lead character is the man filming the entire thing and he's never seen or named.... in 'Mordum', Fred is joined by a brother and sister duo and our original camera man does not return.... Fred is dating the sister, but the sister and brother have a 'special' relationship.... in 'Penance', Fred and Crusty (the sister from 'Mordum') are the leads and carry us out until the series ends.... all three films are tied together by Fred and a loose storyline.... and by loose, i mean it's like watching home movies.... you can only gain so much information by listening to the dialogue between people.... that's kind of the scary part.... there isn't much of a motive other than the killing is fun and they like to do it a LOT.... regardless of that, you still become attached to the characters and want to see how their lives will play out.... (or at least i did.).... all three films are snippits of these people's lives.... the day to day, the goofing around, the concerts they see, the homes they live in and the people they murder.... and it's all edited in such a way that it honestly feels like a home movie.... a lot of people find that boring.... others find it that much more intriguing because of the fact that it's hard to seperate fact from fiction....
the killings are what got these films the reputation that they have.... and make no bones about it, they live up to every bit of hype you've heard.... the actors in this film pull no punches and give Oscar worthy performances.... if you sat someone down who'd never heard of, seen or cared about these movies and told them they were real, they just might belive you.... now i'm not one for spoilers, so i won't get to in depth in the murder part.... but there's lots of blood, guts, maggots, nails, duct tape, a saw, a hammer, screaming, nudity, filth, humiliation, Christmas presents and (i hate to say it) rape.... this stuff will punch you in the gut and keep coming until you either throw up or keep watching.... this is the deep end of the pool, kids.... if you think you've seen horror because you've watched 'The Exorcist' or Alexandre Aja's remake of 'The Hills Have Eyes', you ain't seen nothing yet.... the funny thing is that Fred doesn't glorify it.... in my opinion he makes it so animalistic and brutal that you can't help but feel dirty for watching it.... but that base instinct in you keeps you in your chair just to see what happens next.... you can't believe what's playing out in front of you.... but then suddenly when you think you can't take anymore, it cuts to something from daily life.... and you can breathe again.... that's part of the genius of these films.... and i hate to use that term in regards to such vile fodder, but it's true.... regardless of the potential backlash and disapproval i may hear from this review, these films stand alone as part of film history.... and i don't mean that they're the stuff of tributes during the Oscar's or something you're proud to have in your DVD collection.... i mean they're like the 'Blair Witch Project' or 'Paranormal Activity' or even 'Open Water'.... they provide something that hasn't been seen or done before.... they're original.... he took a concept and ran as far with it as he could.... and if it wasn't for the brilliant special effects, the charisma of the actor's and the sheer balls to make these films i don't think they'd stand out.... it'd just be another crappy indie movie shot on video and fed to the masses....

i want to end this by saying that these films are NOT for everyone.... hell, they're not for a lot of folks.... but if you've said, "I've seen it all and there's nothing new out there anymore.".... maybe these are for you.... maybe you're like me and you like to expand your horizons and being a lover of film, you want to see it all.... perhaps you're just a freak who wants to see how far the envelope can be pushed before it breaks.... maybe you're just the slightest bit curious about all the ultra-violence.... who knows....? i just felt inclined to say something about this series.... after watching them all in two days, i've dwelt on them ever since.... trying to wrap my head around what i saw.... feeling kind of icky and perverted for enjoying the ride, but at the same time feeling satisfied that i took it.... despite my fear.... you may not feel the same way.... you may hate me or Fred or even yourself for these films.... therefore, go into them with an open mind and a strong stomach.... and don't say i didn't warn you.

i'd give them 4 out of 5 stars.... with 'August Underground' being the strongest, followed by 'Penance' and 'Mordum' being last.... only because it seemed to focus the most on the gore and not the characters....

other movies like these....? 'Srpski Film aka A Serbian Film' perhaps....? these really stand alone as a genre in and of themselves.... "serial killer home movies"

trailer for 'August Underground':


trailer for 'August Underground: Mordum':

August underground's mordum

trailer for 'August Underground: Penance':

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Teenape Goes To Camp'

who doesn't like a good/bad movie....?!?! (well, some people don't i guess.) i love em'....! and i've stayed away from LBP: Low Budget Productions movies because they look bad/bad not good/bad.... when 'Teenape Goes To Camp' came up on Netflix OnDemand, i decided it was time to give it a go.... the reviews were poor, the comments were poor and very little was positive.... however, the thought of a dude in a gorilla mask talking like a stereotyped urban dweller and the chance to see some of the worst sex scenes in movie history.... how could i say no....? and boy, i wasn't sorry.... granted this was not high art and walked a thin line between good/bad and bad/bad, it ended up being worth my barely over 1 hour running time to watch it.... it's so incredibly stupid and over the top that it's dumb fun.... i would recommend you watch it alone, as it's not something you want your friends to find out you're watching.... trust me.
there are so many things wrong with this movie, but a lot of them have to do with budget constraints.... the script is piss poor, but that adds to the charm.... the characters are WAY over the top and half of them don't even make sense.... the acting is TERRIBLE.... the "action" sequences at the climax of the movie are laughable.... all that being said, would i watch another Teenape movie....? HECK YEAH....! something about it is so charming.... and i can't pinpoint what it is, it's just fun and stupid.... i honestly think that's what the filmaker was intending.... i don't think anyone ever set out to make a good movie.... i think it's just a bunch of overgrown adult kids with a camera and a lot of extra time.... either way, watch it.... if you can make it all the way to the end, you might just thank me....

if you like this, dig around.... these guys have made some other movies that i'm sure are equally as bad.

my very brief thoughts on.... 'Anatomy of Hell'

well, well, well.... Catherine Breillat you've done it again.... you've written another pretentious, overly hyped piece of crap.... at least this one only ran a bit over an hour.... i've sat through three of your films now an i can honestly say i'm not a fan.... and i don't understand your place in cinema.... maybe i'm watching the wrong films of yours....? perhaps i don't understand them....? (i kind of doubt it.) or perhaps they're just garbage....? just because something is provocative and the people talk like overly educated hipsters doesn't make it art.... and just because you include XXX rated nudity and sex, doesn't make it high art.... i've seen films that include hard core scenes and they made sense with the story.... in your movies, it seems like you do it just to shock and to give yourself a name....
to everyone else who may see this movie or 'Romance' or 'A Real Young Girl'.... stop yourself before you start.... or watch it and see if you agree with what i'm saying....? 'Anatomy of Hell' is OnDemand right now on Netflix.... i personally have seen enough of her work now that i can say i'm not a fan and i've given her every opportunity to make me one.... she's going to continue making movies and she's going to continue getting praise and i'm going to continue ignoring them.... ah well.... so be it.

if you want something sexually explicit with bad dialogue, watch a porn.