my thoughts on.... 'Chop' (2011)

With a simple title like 'Chop', this movie can easily sneak under the average film goers radar. It's unassuming and not your average big budget blockbuster. It's the dictonary definition of an indie film. Now, this little comedy nasty is directed by the writer of 'Deadgirl', Trent Haaga. Why he didn't write this? I'm not sure. You may have heard of 'Deadgirl' (if you read my review), but this one never got the same recognition, as it's not as controversial. Where as 'Deadgirl' was a very dark and twisted tale of the "undead" and other ugly things, this is more of a light hearted look at revenge. I actually had really high hopes after watching the trailer and I really enjoyed the first 3/4 of the movie. Towards then end though, it kind of started to fall apart just a bit. Not too mention that the ending was either the most satisfying ending ever written or the least satisfying ending ever written. I still am not sure exactly how I feel about the movie as a whole, since the ending was so.... um, odd. If you want to see it, before you finish this review, it's available on Netflix OnDemand as of this past week. Also, you may recognize the lead actor and are asking yourself, "Who the hell is that guy and where do I know him from?" His name is Will Keenan. He's the star of Troma's classic Shakespeare adaptaion, 'Tromeo and Juliet'. He really stands out in this movie and I kind of hope it finally gives him a bit more stardom than he's had before. Honestly, everyone in this movie seems to really be enjoying the whole experience. I think it has a lot to do with the somewhat original storyline. Let's get to that part, before going any further.

The plot is actualy quite simple. (taken from IMDB.com) "Lance Reed is forced by a psychotic stranger to confront his duplicitous past. Seeking retribution for a crime, the man forces Lance to reveal his inner most secrets by systematically removing his limbs." or there's this version: (taken from Netflix.com) "After accepting a ride when his car breaks down, Lance finds himself tortured by a man from his past he can't remember who holds a grudge for events Lance has forgotten. Now Lance must choose between saving the life of his brother or his wife." Both of these plot breakdowns are accurate. The simplest way of looking at this is, Lance has to remember what the heck he did to piss off his captor, before he has all his limbs chopped off.... literally. He's tortured for almost the entire movie, but not in the 'Hostel' way. It's much more psychological and comical. It gets to a point where you're not entirely sure what's going on anymore than Lance does. Not too mention that the cops aren't much of a help either. It's kind of brilliant.

You now have all of the pieces of the puzzle, but what you don't have is the ending. I'm not entirely sure that the writer did either. Like I said earlier, I can't determine how I feel about it. I don't want any spoilers here, just in case you decide to see it. And I don't know that I have a better ending in mind. It just felt too much like a student film. Perhaps that's my issue with it. The fact that it seemed like the typical student film finale. One that is supposed to be ironic or cool, but as the film maker gets more seasoned, they realize that they can do so much more to create a good ending. It doesn't make it bad, it just makes it feel a bit lazy. As the same time, it's so rare to see someone take a leap of faith and go for the gut punch ending. I can honestly say that I did NOT see the ending playing out the way it did. I really had no idea how it could end well. You're also given lots of possible solutions along the way, but they never really reveal much. It's refreshing.

Just like this movie, my review is disjointed and broken. It feels a slight bit unfinished, but I don't think it would have been so charming if it was done any other way. It's just a fun little movie. Plain and simple. Everybody in it seems to be having fun, therefore the viewer has fun and that makes you want to watch it again. That, to me, is the sign of a good film maker. I just hope that their next project is a bit more well polished. I'd love to see what they can do at full stregth. Even with all of the little negative bits, I still gave this movie 4 out of 5 stars. Mostly, for just being a good time and a bit of a 'no-brainer'. Just be open minded for the ending. If you don't over think it too much, you just might be plesantly surprised.

If you like this, check out: 'Deadgirl', 'Tromeo and Juliet' and 'Easter Bunny, Kill! Kill!'

my thoughts on.... 'The Mad'

I'm a secret Billy Zane fan. I don't announce it outloud or too often, but I've been a fan ever since I saw 'The Phantom'. Granted, it wasn't a great movie, but he did the best he could with what he had. Not too mention, his role in 'Zoolander' was awesome. Anyway, I recently came across this little zombie comedy called 'The Mad'. It sounded vaguely interesting in concept, but then I saw that Mr. Zane was the star of it and I threw it into the top of my queue. Last night, despite feeling like garbage, I had the pleasure of watching this little indie gem from 2007. I don't know how this didn't get a little more press. There are a lot of other movies that came out around this time that were similar and not as good. I guess it's just the way things go. Anyway, it is not a new concept that is used in this movie. Some of it is done in a new way, but the overall idea is a rehash of other concepts. 'The Mad' has a very nice feel to it. While I was watching it, I found myself just smiling at the little situations going on. I think that's what put this movie ahead of other similar movies, Billy Zane's charisma.

The plot, according to Netflix.com: "On an outing to the country, a doctor and his daughter stop in a town known for its organic beef. But the travelers run up against a mutated virus that turns people into the undead and hamburger patties into ravenous killers." That pretty much sums it up. The only thing that's a bit inaccurate is that it's not just the hamburger patties, but slices of beef in general that's what makes this movie a bit different than the others. I mean, how often have you seen a prime cut of beef slid of a mans leg and attack him? I'm guessing.... never. Now, before you jump to an conclusions, the cows themselves don't attack people (that would have been pretty keen though!) it's more about their tainted meat. Literally.This movie shines as a labor of love of everyone involved. It doesn't seem like anyone in this movie wasn't having fun. They also took the material just seriously enough to make the concept believable and that just makes it that much funnier. It's not a fall down kind of a funny, but the kind that makes you want to rewatch what you've just seen. The effects are good, the actors are good and the direction is good. I'm a bit zombie lover, it's my bread and butter of horror. These days, every Tom, Dick and Harry make their own zombie movies. You can't throw a rock anywhere without hitting a low budget zombie flick. Sadly, the majority of them kind of suck. That's what made it so much more enjoyable when I stumbled across this one. A diamond in the rough.

In conclusion, despite all of the good points about this movie.... I still only found it to be 3 out of 5 stars. It is just a little slice of simple comedy/horror fun. It won't change the face of the genre or tread any new ground. It just is what it is and did what it set out to accomplish.... to entertain. I obviously enjoyed this movie and I absolutely recommend that you watch this. Anyone who enjoys any of the things I've written about this movie, throw it in the Netflix queue now as I returned my copy today. That means it'll be ready to rent by tomorrow or the next day. In the meantime, I'm having some beef tonight.... it's whats for dinner.

If you like this, you may also like: 'Shaun of the Dead', 'Black Sheep', 'Zombieland' and 'Dance of the Dead'

my thoughts on.... 'AAAH! ZOMBIES!!'

As I've said in earlier posts, it's really hard to find anything new in the zombie genre. It seems like everything has been done and re-done. However, I was pointed in the direction of 'AAAH! ZOMBIES!!' and what I saw was something new. It proved that there may still be some life in the undead. Before I get into why it was fresh and new, I have to confess that I HATE talking zombies. By "talking", I mean ones that speak in complete sentences. Zombies are basically a shark. One track mind to kill and eat, nothing else. They grunt, goan and moan but they do not talk. 'AAAH! ZOMBIES!!' had talking zombies, but they presented them in a way that I didn't hate! It was a unique twist on how zombies might communicate with each other. It shows how zombies might think and what it might be like to turn into the walking dead. Haven't you ever wondered what it's like on the flip side of the undead coin? I know I have.

So what's the plot and the big secret to success? The plot is that of some friends who are just hanging out, when the military messes up and toxic chemicals are released. Eventually, people start turning into zombies. The four friends become zombies too. The thing is, they don't realize they're zombies right away. And as far as the audience is concerned, we see them as still human in black and white, but as zombies in color. So one minute they're having an intelligent conversation and trying to figure out what's going on and then we flip to color and they're just standing there (as zombies) moaning and groaning at each other. After the four realize what they've become, they start fighting for the rights of the living challenged. They also take on the military to try and get to a 'safe zone' where they might be able to start a new life with a colony of zombies all living together. Do they make it? Do they eat people? Do they get shot in the head? You'll have to watch it to find out. 'AAAH! ZOMBIES!!', rated 'R'.

With the set up of the undead being able to still communicate and understand each other, but sound unintelligent to everyone else, that's what sets up a lot of the comedy in this movie. Because they shift back and forth between the zombie world and the real world and seeing them hiding out, talking to the military, etc. it's very entertaining. One of the other things that's humorous, is one of the main characters realizing that he now has a taste for human flesh. For example, a living person gets their head blown off and while everyone else is talking about it and in shock, he starts eating their brains. He asks, "Is anyone going to finish that?" At which point, everyone else gets kind of grossed out. This movie is very clever and pretty well written. It's not without its flaws, but I very rarely ever see a movie that's 'perfect'. Have you? This movie is low budget and it's pretty obvious, but that doesn't take away from its charm. It just shows how much heart this movie has. Somebody was really proud of this concept and gave it the best they could to make it the best movie they could.

Between the good, the bad and the flaws, I gave it 3 out of 5 stars. I think it has 're-watchability' and that's saying something. It may even deserve a higher rating. I mean, any movie that can have talking zombies and still have me enjoying it, has accomplished something. The actors are good, the direction is good and even the special effects and look of the movie are good. It's on Netflix OnDemand right now, so I would take advantage of that fact.... if you can. You could even watch it tonight, if you wanted too! So all that being said, are you still one of those jaded horror fans who's said that they've seen it all in the zombie genre? Perhaps you haven't and perhaps you should watch this movie and prove to yourself that an old dog can learn new tricks.... even a dead one.

Movies similar to this? 'Shaun of the Dead, 'Doghouse' and 'Stacy'

my brief thoughts on.... 'Zombie Strippers'

as dedicated readers of my blog, you know of my love for zombies.... you may also have gathered that i stay away from a lot of zombie movies because they're really low budget and look like crap.... this one made it on my radar, but was ignored because it looked pretty terrible.... the only thing that kept me interested was the fact that Robert Englund was in it.... that still wasn't enough to get me to watch it.... even it being OnDemand didn't light my fire.... however, when a friend recommended that i watch this.... i couldn't say, "No." any longer.... so i loaded up the queue, grabbed some snacks, and fired up the Netflix.... an hour and a half later, i was satisfied and spent.... what a fun little ride.... i felt bad with myself for passing judgement before having seen it and making a decision for myself.... needless to say, that won't happen again.... i may wait for a bit to watch something until my bias is gone.... but that doesn't mean i won't ever watch something.... anyway.... this movie is a complete farce.... it's all tongue in cheek and that's what makes it damn fun.... i mean, you have a porn star in the lead, what'd you expect....?

this movie opens with a hilariously bad action sequence and that leads to one of the infected to escape and make it to a strip club.... once he's there, he begins to infect people inside.... one of them is a stripper who, once she's a zombie, begins to dance and drives all the men wild.... realizing the marketing potential, Robert Englund's sleazy manager begins to exploit the zombie stripper.... the only problem is that they have to sacrifice someone to her to keep her happy.... then others begin to turn and soon things are out of control.... but how does it end....? let's just say it gets messy....
i tend to judge the quality or re-watchability of a movie by if i'll want it in my DVD library or not.... and what zombie DVD collection is complete without 'Zombie Strippers'....? i say that it isn't complete if this title is missing.... you've got strippers and blood, guts, and gore.... it's got comedy and action.... it has a whole lot going for it.... regardless of that, i still only gave it 3 out of 5 stars.... it was a fun movie, but not a great movie.... it's still a low budget, exploitation, zombie movie.... however, it's a darn enjoyable one.... it's available to rent or watch OnDemand, so everyone can be happy.... you've got no reason not to watch it....! just check out the trailer and you'll see what i'm talking about.... and take it from a zombie aficionado, this one is a winner.... and something i will be watching again, possibly even tonight.

if you like this and want other zombie comedies, check out: 'Shaun of the Dead', 'Tokyo zonbi aka Tokyo Zombie', and 'The Last of the Living' (2008)

my thoughts on.... 'The Short Films of David Lynch'

David Lynch is an artist.... one of a very small group of living artists that i can honestly say that i respect.... it took me a while to understand the mind of David Lynch and to appreciate his films.... but now, i watch and re-watch his films getting something new out of them everytime.... i wait for his next projects to emerge.... and i appreciate the dedication that he has to his art.... it's rare to find someone who basically lives for creation and the joy of new ideas.... whether or not you can appreciate him the way that i do, you have to respect his vision and his never compromise attitude.

this collection of 6 short films is a compilation of his earliest work and some other more recent pieces of work.... it's a nice cross-section of his non-feature length films.... not all of these are stand out examples of what he's capable of, but every artist has to experiment to find his voice.... that's kind of what some of this is, watching someone figure out who they are on film.... so you kind of have to take these with a grain of salt.... don't expect them all to be 4 star films and you won't be disappointed....
(these descriptions are being paraphrased from Netflix....)
1) 'Six Men Getting Sick': this is David Lynch's very first film.... it's a one minute loop of an art installation.... it was originally projected over a sculpture.... the film describes it perfectly, it's 6 men's heads getting sick and vomiting....
2) 'The Alphabet': this is a 5 minute short that David Lynch describes as an illustration of "the fear of learning".... it's a blend of live-action and animation.... where the alphabet is basically being 'born'....
3) 'The Grandmother': in this film, a little boy who's been mistreated by his parents decides to grow his own grandmother.... so he plants a seed and gets his wish, at least for a little while....
4) 'The Amputee': David Lynch is actually in this live-action comedy short.... he plays the nurse.... while he attempts to clean her wounds, she is oblivious to all of the horrible things happening at the same time....
5) 'The Cowboy and the Frenchman': this comedy was produced by French television and shows a stereotypical Frenchmen being thrust into the middle of some cowboys and a native American.... it stars one of David Lynch's favorites, Harry Dean Stanton....
6) 'Lumiere': this is a 52-second, single-take short film.... it was filmed with Auguste and Louis Lumiere's original Cinematographe, which was the cutting edge of film technology in 1895....

there may be times during this 6 films that you have to struggle a bit.... as they can be slow or seem repetitive.... but if you persist, you'll find something unique in each of them to enjoy.... and for those of you who are fans of David Lynch, this is a must.... those of you who aren't, may want to start elsewhere in his library of film and television.... i ended up only give this 3 out of 5 stars.... which is unusual for a Lynch film from me.... but it's a rounded off score based on a rating given to each short film.... like i said already, some are better than others....

if you like this, watch: 'Eraserhead', 'The Elephant Man', or 'Inland Empire'

this is David Lynch's short film: 'The Alphabet'.... to give you an idea of what to expect:

my very brief thoughts on.... '2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams'

Herschell Gordon Lewis set the standard for gore.... and he did it starting in the 60's....! before he came along, horror movies were fairly tame by today's standards.... they were starting down the path towards more horrific things, but Herschell saw a niche market out there and he filled it.... the blood was obviously fake and the guts and stuff were borrowed from other animals insides.... but regardless of that, i still find his movies a little difficult to watch at times.... like 'The Gore Gore Girls'.... what does that have to do with '2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams'....? well, it's the sequel to the remake of Herschell's 1964 classic '2000 Maniacs!'.... the original was just that, it was original.... the reamke had some of the same spirit, but it just never captured the magic.... for some reason though, they decided to make a sequel to the first one.... instead of Robert Englund ('A Nightmare on Elm Street' series) in the lead, they replaced his character with one played by Bill Moseley ('The Devil's Rejects').... they continued the storyline of the first one, with more of the southerners who killed the 'yankees' in the first one taking their show on the road to kill 'yankees' instead....
i love Bill Moseley and he does the best he can with his role in this movie, but it's just not a very good movie.... they attempt to re-create the type of gore that Herschell Gordon Lewis made famous, but they fall short of the mark.... it's a bit lame at times and i think that's kind of the point.... however, i was hoping for a little more.... they also include in the storyline some main characters ('yankees') who are very similar to those of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie during the 'Simple Life' years.... it's not subtle, as a matter of fact it's blatent.... i would've rather seen those two getting chopped up on camera, but that's too much to hope for.... all that being said, you can aready guess that i only gave it 1 out of 5 stars.... there was nothing worthwhile in this movie other than Bill Moseley.... but it's not worth the damage it will cause to watch this, just to enjoy the scenes he's in.... this is a sequel that should have just stayed in the back of someones mind as a bad idea.... instead of on DVD as a bad idea.

if you want to see where this all began, watch: 'Two Thousand Maniacs!' (1964), 'Blood Feast' (1963), or 'Color Me Blood Red' (1965)

my brief thoughts on.... 'Blood On The Highway'

here we go again with yet anothe vampire movie....! okay, okay.... i admit it.... i like the genre again.... well, as long as movies like this one keep coming out.... this movie is very much in the vein of 'Evil Dead 2' or 'Dead Alive'.... plenty of blood, comedy, action and great characters to love.... (Tom Towles steals the show just a bit.).... this was a surprise of a movie.... i just happened upon it on one my regular horror blogs i frequent.... and i saw an ad for it.... since i'd never heard of it, i did a little research and decided that i had to see it for myself.... it was a happy day when i saw it and realized that people were still out there capable of making this kind of movie on a low budget and pulling off a worthwhile product.... i mean, i haven't had this much fun at a vampire movie since 'From Dusk Till' Dawn'.... it's that kind of movie.... sort of.... you've got all your stereotypes represented.... you've got a unique take on why the vampires exist in the first place.... and you have a group of kids that get involved on accident and turn it to be less the victim and more the hero.... i guess i'm just saying this was a refreshing movie to watch and enjoy....

3 friends are on their way to an annual music event and end up getting sidetracked and lost.... they end up in a little town called 'Fate' and soon find out that the town has been over run by vampires.... and the small population of humans that are left are battling to survive against overwhelming odds.... (sound pretty serious so far, but in reality it's not.).... the three friends get mixed up in the whole mess and soon find themselves smack dab at ground zero for the final showdown between the humans and the vampires and learn the ultimate truth as to why the whole horror story started at all.... and let me tell you, it's not what you think.... (but after you watch the movie, check out the special features for some funny tie ins to the storyline.)i highly recommend this for fans of any of the movies i've mentioned so far.... this received 4 out of 5 stars even before it was over.... it was such a strong little piece of filmaking that i couldn't help but love it....! not too mention the frat boy character is hilarious....!!!! (played by one of the writers of the movie.).... you also have Nicholas Brandon from 'Buffy' in a small but important role at the end.... and he's not typecast at all.... he's playing against his normal grain.... and he does a good job.... so if you've got time to rent a movie online or at the video store and you can find it.... please take my word for it and pick it up.... it's a diamond in the rough and soon to be a cult classic.... you want to get in on the ground floor of this one.... so you can be one of the cool kids.... right....? it's blood soaked fun and sometimes laugh out loud funny.... low budget filmaking at his best.

if you like this, check out: 'Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn', 'Dead Alive aka Brain Damage' and 'From Dusk Till' Dawn'

my brief thoughts on.... 'Tokyo Zombie'

take 'Shaun of the Dead' and mix in Jujitsu and you've got something like 'Tokyo Zombie'.... a Japanese zombie comedy.... the first thing i should mention is that for Netflix OnDemand users, this is dubbed.... so if that annoys you, don't watch and just rent instead.... but i watched it regardless.... and the dubbing was pretty good for once.... the guy playing the Fujio's voice was hilarious.... it fit perfectly.... not too mention, how many Japanese guys do you see with an afro....?!?! there's a lot of your typical Japanese themes in this.... and they all work really well in this movie.... it does borrow a bit from George A. Romero's 'Land of the Dead', but it's all in good fun, right....? i laughed at this and loved every minute of it....

Fujio and Mitsuo are two best friends who work in a fire extenguisher warehouse spending most of their days practicing the art of Jujitsu.... until the zombies begin to attack and they have to use their skills to fight of the oncoming hordes.... this movie takes place over a 5 year stretch and covers a lot of ground.... so the rest of the plot will just have to wait until you see it to find out the rest....the ending was silly and a true Japanese over the top ending.... the characters are very likable and you can't help but root for this underdogs.... the zombies start out a little questionable, but get better later in the movie.... although they do take some liberties with how much ass kicking the zombies can do.... but it's all just one big horror fantasy, so who cares....? it's not as funny as 'Shaun of the Dead', but it's just as fun to watch.... i gave it 3 out of 5 stars.... but a high 3 stars.... it sets out to tell a story in a certain way and it gives you everything that the opening promises.... so if you like zombies and Japanese comedies, this one may just tickle your funny bone.... or at least spank it and fondle it.... (see the movie.)

other movies like this: 'Shaun of the Dead', 'Dance of the Dead' (2008) and 'Stacey'